New Month
I feel a renewed energy heading into this year. (MAN I CANNOT WAIT TO GET THESE NAILS OFF… I CAN’T TYPE WHICH IS FRUSTRATING) Shorter nail will absolutely be in my future.
My first goal for this year is sticking to my social media time allowance. Who cares if that is how I am communicating with people, they will receive a response from me when I check the app. If it’s urgent, they’ll text me. And if they don’t have my number, this boundary will help further acquiring said number. The days that I am off social media are the best. I am present. It’s this double edge, where I also want to share what I am doing day to day. I have been much more freely sharing what I want and without checking who viewed it which has helped free myself from this perceived judgement I created in my head. I am going to share what I want because just like this post and website, it’s for me.
The second goal is to be more intentional when I smoke. I was doing so well to the point where I had fully cut it out of my life. I had sweat out all of the THC in my system. It’s wild how the women’s body stores the components of weed differently. I am giving myself today to freely smoke and enjoy my day off. However the rest of the week, my bong will be cleaned and everything will be put away. I want to sweat out the weed again. I want to have vivid dreams again. I did it out of spite, but what for? It didn’t back fire onto anyone else besides me. I will be able to do it.
Within the month of September, I will have reached 50 plus days of meditating daily. The clarity I have been able to reach by doing that everyday is something I didn’t realize until I was doing it more than a week. I am able to approach the first two goals with such a clearer approach. With that being said I know that I will be able to achieve them. This will be the month that they become a habit.
I believe I will gain clarity on a situation that I’ve let be apart of my life for far too long. I told myself and some friends that it will expire by the end of this year. There is no renewal after that. If I have to give myself closure to this situation again, then it’s a wrap. I know my worth now, you’ve got to do better. I’ve recently come around to love blocking. It’s freeing to know that they have no access to me. I’m too grown to put up with people who don’t want to or see an effort in me being in their life.
My final goal that I want to mention is that I will have my portfolio updated and ready to be sent out. I am deserving of a new job. The chapter has come. I know I am needed there, but I know I deserve more for myself. I love designing my portfolio since it showcases how much I’ve grown. I was never able to do what I do now had it not been for all the experience. It’s beautiful to see.
After many days of having this in my draft, here goes nothing!! Here’s to having a great month with many beautiful memories and accomplishments to come. I know I am capable. The little voice that tells me I am not, I need to get ride of or not listen.
